Recently, I have noticed that a lot of people are finding it easier to publish their feelings on the internet instead of actually speaking to their friends. I confess that I am one of those people. I get overly defensive if someone that I know has read something that I have written on a blog that I thought that no one knew about, or if they ask me if they can look at my blog.
I don’t understand it, but I constantly wonder why people write down their feelings on a service where plenty of strangers can easily find it. What makes “talking” to people you don’t know about your deepest darkest secrets so much easier than actually telling someone that you may have known for years?
I know I am one of those people, and that I get only a little bit agitated (Ok, really agitated) when someone confronts me about a blog post that I may have written about what I was feeling at the time, or a tweet that I had written whilst I was in a bad mood with a friend. So why do I find it ok when complete randomers reply to me? Is it that it gives me comfort when someone I don’t know replies to me and tells me that they know what I am going through? Because if that’s the case, shouldn’t I be able to tell my friends anyway; the people that have got me through so many situations and should be my shoulder to cry on?
I follow plenty of people on Tumblr who are able to admit their weaknesses with cutting themselves and depression and their sexual experiences, but why would they post this where I can see it? I follow people that I have never met before in my life yet I know quite a lot of their deepest, darkest secrets, purely because they’re able to post it on a social networking site? Yet from personal experience, I know that they probably haven’t told their friends; and would feel offended if their friend merely asked to read their blog.
Call me crazy, but when we pick our friends, don’t we pick them based on how much we trust them, how well they listen to you, how much they care for you and the advice that they give you? Yet with the internet, this bond between friends is being shattered by the fact that we’d all rather tell complete strangers in the hope that someone knows how we’re feeling; that they might have a little bit of advice because they know what they’re going through.
But what happens when you actually have a friend on this social networking site, the site that you’re posting these suicidal thoughts on? I know for a fact that since people that I know personally have started following me on Twitter, I’ve started slowly posting less things of any relevance, and purely mentioning the fact that I had a sandwich that afternoon. No one cares about anything like that, but it gets me out of mentioning the fact that I might have felt a little bit miserable.
I’ll tell you one other thing that is just as hard as posting something really deep about your feelings on a social networking site, and that is seeing your friends post it. On one hand, it definitely gives you a heads up to know that this person is in a bad mood so you can ask them what is wrong; but then you start to question why they didn’t tell you in the first place. The excuse “I didn’t want you to think any less of me” is getting pretty old now. So if you didn’t want your friends to think any less of you, why would you post it on a site that they, as well as nearly every single person on the internet has access to?
It’s pretty hard to delete your footprint from the internet once it is posted; I think I heard once that even if you delete it, it’s still there.
It turns out that the internet is now everyone’s personal diary, as well as their shoulder to cry on when they’re feeling a little bit vulnerable.
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